Let battle commence! Prepare for a bizarre crossover, with
action,
adventure, a hefty helping of my trademark humour, and more
fights than you
can shake a webshooter at!!
- - -
MARVEL COMICS vs. DIGIMON!
Chapter One
"Mission Impossible"
- - -
"Catch me if ya can, rubber man!"
The elasticated arms of Reed Richards, better known as Mr.
Fantastic, leader
of the world-renowned superhero team, the Fantastic Four,
stretched out
across his laboratory within Pier Four, reaching for the
intruder.
There was a brief implosion of air, and the figure disappeared,
as Reed's
hands closed down around the empty space where he and been
standing. With
another pop, he appeared behind Reed, and jumped on his
shoulders, clamping
his hands around his eyes.
"Guess whoo-oooh!" the imp-like figure giggled, before
popping away as Reed
reached to grab him again.
"Impossible Man, please..." Reed muttered, "I'm
very busy... I don't have
time for games..."
The nameless Poppupian who the Fantastic Four knew as the
Impossible Man
materialised with his trademark "pop" sound effect, on
top of one of Reed's
consoles, legs and arms crossed, scowling.
"You're soooo boring!" the imp whined. "I've been
away for so long, and this
is how I get greeted when I drop in to see old friends? I was
hoping the FF
could give me some entertainment!"
"Well, I hate to disappoint," Reed said, allowing his
arms to contract back
to normal, "but I'm engaged in some important research on
the space/time
continuum. Recent events, like the Onslaught imbroglio, and the
coming of
the Celestials has made the fabric of reality very weak, and
I'm..."
"Blah, blah, BLAH!!" the Impossible Man screamed,
popping up directly in
front of Reed's face. Reed enlarged his hand and pushed the
purple-clad
alien away.
"So, please, let me get back to my work," Reed pleaded.
"Aw, fine," the Impossible Man poked his tongue out.
"You big boring bore of
a boring man, you."
"Thank you," Reed said, turning back to the device that
lay on the nearest
console, and picking up a circuit welder as the Poppupian
disappeared.
It was less than ten seconds later when a pop was heard, and a
squeal of
"Ooooh... what does THIS button do?" reached Reed's
ears. He turned, and saw
a green and purple girl with a huge head, incredibly long legs
and pigtails
running around behind him, pointing at random things.
"What are you DOING?" Reed asked.
"Don't you watch cartoons?" the Impossible Man queried,
pop-morphing from
Dee-Dee to Dexter before Reed's eyes. "You are
stuuuuupid."
"I'm afraid I have no idea what you're referring to..."
The imp groaned, and popped into his normal shape. "So
what's that gizmo you
're working on?" he asked.
"Well, it's..." Reed stopped short as the Poppupian
disappeared. He waited
for a second, then sighed, and turned around again, only to have
the alien
pop up in front of him and snatch the device from the console.
"Oooh, pretty lights!" he giggled, shaking the widget.
"AH!" Reed yelped. "Put that down! It's very
sensitive!"
Reed stretched out his arms, attempting to snatch the machine
back from the
imp, but the nuisance simply popped over to the other side of the
lab.
"C'mon!" he squealed. "Tell me tell me tell
me!"
"It's a temporal/spatial disruptor..." Reed said,
slowly, "...now PLEASE...
put it DOWN..."
The Impossible Man assumed the form of Reed's four year old son,
Franklin.
"Or what?" he asked. "Gonna gimmie a
spanking?" The alien disappeared again
as Reed darted towards him.
"Over here!" he called out from atop a console.
POP!
"No, over here!"
POP!
"Or is it here!"
POP!
Reed waited.
But this time, the Impossible Man did not reappear.
- - -
Life sucks, DemiDevimon thought. Well... naw... actually... DEATH
sucks...
The little bat-like Digital Monster floated endlessly through a
sea of white
nothing, a permanent scowl fixed on his features. He had been
this way for
far longer than he cared to remember.
Ya give a guy th' best years'a your life, an' what happens? He
ups and EATS
YA!
DemiDevimon recalled how his master, Myotismon, having Digivolved
into his
Mega form of VenomMyotismon, before commencing his large-scale
demolition of
the Odaiba district in Tokyo, and simply inhaled his most
faithful servant,
absorbing him into him, using his energy to power himself. The
DigiDestined
children had eventually destroyed VenomMyotismon, of course...
but because
he died in the real world, he could not be reformatted into a
Digi-Egg back
in the Digital World. Myotismon's spirit lived on, and returned
to plague
the DigiDestined some time later, but DemiDevimon's spirit was
left
wandering... neither in the real world, like Wizardmon, or in the
Digital
World. DemiDevimon had become stuck in the
void between dimensions. And it was certainly no picnic.
The little bat had no idea how big the white void was - he
assumed it went
on forever. He wasn't sure when he had stopped talking - at
first, he talked
to himself, to try and stop himself from going crazy, but then he
decided
that he didn't actually LIKE he had to say, so he stopped before
he got into
a fight with himself, and he hadn't been quite the same since.
So, when he collided with a small green imp wearing a purple
tunic and
carrying a hunk of pointy metal who appeared right in front of
him out of
nowhere, he was more than a little surprised.
"Watch where yer goin', avocado-head!" the bat shrieked
at the being, before
he came to his senses, and realised just what was happening.
The imp dusted himself off, and with a pop, assumed the form of
Steve
Martin. "Well EXCUU-UUSE ME!!" he roared at the bat,
who was physically
blown back slightly by the force of his words. The imp returned
to his
normal shape.
"Wh-who the hell are you?" the dazed DemiDevimon
inquired. "And where'd you
come from?"
"I am a Poppupian, from the planet Poppup," the imp
replied. "My race has no
names, but you can call me the Impossible Man."
"I'm DemiDevimon," the Digimon replied.
"And what are you doin' here?"
"This is the dimensional divide," the Impossible Man
said, telling
DemiDevimon something he already knew. "When I teleport, I
come here, then
return to wherever I came from. It's like an interdimensional
short cut. I
was just in the middle of harassing Reed Richards, when you so
rudely
smacked into me and stopped be from popping back."
"Never heard of him."
The Poppupian's eyes literally leapt out of their sockets and
grew to six
times their normal size, as his mouth morphed into a loudspeaker,
and an
"AWOOGA!" sound leapt from his lips. "How can you
NOT have heard of Reed
Richards?! Mister Fantastic? Of the Fantastic Four?"
The bat shook his head - or more correctly, his entire body.
"Sounds like we
come from... different regions, huh?" he said with a grin.
"Ooh, a weirdo from another dimension!" the imp
squealed. With a pop, he
took on the shape of William Shatner. "A... new world! A....
bold new...
CIVILISATION! Somewhere MAN... has... never BEEN... BEFORE!"
"Yah, right, uh-huh, great," DemiDevimon mumbled.
"Well, I ain't no
teleporter, an' I've been stuck here for all of forever, buster.
Any chance
you might see your way to helpin' a fellow mischief maker
out?"
"On onnnne condition!" the imp grinned. "You take
me to your world! My
playmates back in my dimension have run out of comedy value... I
need
someone NEW to torment!"
"I can't take you anywhere," DemiDevimon replied.
"Yer the one who's takin'
me."
"Hmn, that IS a stickler," the Impossible Man said,
popping into the form of
Albert Einstein and rubbing his chin. "Vot you zink vee
should do?" Setting
the hunk of machinery he had pilfered from Reed Richards down, he
sat on it,
and transformed into the Thinker statue.
"Hey, rocky," the bat tapped him with his wing.
"What the frag is that?" The
small Digimon indicated the device upon which the
Poppupian's buttocks
presently rested.
"Oh, it's a... temporary... special... whoojamajigger,"
the elven
extraterrestrial informed him, returning to his normal shape.
A wide grin spread across DemiDevimon's face. "Believe it or
not, I know
what yer tryin' to say... and I think it could come in very
useful..."
- - -
"Push the button."
"This button?"
"NO, NOT THAT BUTTON! THE *BUTTON*!!"
"THIS one?"
"Does that LOOK like a BUTTON?!"
"Oh, okay, now I got it!"
The Impossible Man's spindly finger stabbed down on a grey button
on the
surface of the device, which immediately hummed into life. With a
sucking,
slurping sound, a small circle in the white void caved in on
itself, and
slowly began to widen, a roaring wind picking up and tugging on
the two
misfits.
"There's no place like home!" DemiDevimon laughed, as
he allowed the gale to
lift him up, and pull him down through the portal.
"Aunty Em, Aunty Em!" the Impossible Man giggled,
hovering in mid air with
his hands behind his head, slowly moving down through the portal,
grabbing
the disruptor at the last minute and bringing it through the
dimensional
doorway with him.
- - -
"EEEEE! Lookit the purty flowers!"
The Impossible Man darted back and forth, from tree to bush,
popping from
random form to random form. DemiDevimon made a face.
"Bleargh... the ol'
place has changed... it's all... NICE and crap..."
The Impossible Man materialised beside the bat. "So, c'mon,
take me to where
the action's at! I got a wantin' to do some tauntin'!"
"That might be a bit of a problem," DemiDevimon
replied. "See, I could see
everythin' that was goin' on when I was stuck in Whitesville...
thing is, my
old boss came back and took the DigiDestined - kids who look
after this
world - on again, an' got beat. But then they did some crazy crap
where they
protected the whole world from evil."
"No fighting?!" the Impossible Man yelped.
"Don't look like it."
"Hrmn," the imp grunted, rubbing his hands together.
"Guess I'll have to
START some, then..."
"Hey, watch out!"
There was a squelching noise, as the Impossible Man looked up too
late, and
found himself smeared across the underside of a large, red, scaly
foot.
The Tyrannomon which had stepped on him looked down, puzzled, and
flicked
the green goop of his foot, before continuing on his way. The imp
popped
back into his normal form, clutching his head, and watching the
dinosaur
Digimon go. "Yeah..." he yelled after it, waving
his fist. "And let that be
a lesson to you!" Staggering, the alien leant against a
tree. "Mommy, I
think I need to lie down..."
Suddenly, a buzzing reached the elf's ears, as he looked up into
the
branches of the tree, where the noise was coming from.
"Brown Stingers!"
Two sharp brown daggers cut downward through the air, pinning the
Impossible
Man to the ground by his tunic, as a huge bee-like creature
zipped out of
the tree and off over the horizon.
"Heh, you okay down there, slick?" DemiDevimon
inquired, hovering over his
head.
"Show me the way to go home... I'm tired and I wanna go to
bed..." the
Impossible Man garbled tunelessly. Moving sluggishly, he yanked
the stingers
free, and got to his feet, unsteadily. "I need a
drink..."
"There's a lake over there..." the bat indicated with
his wing, and the imp
lurched off.
Dropping to his knees, the Impossible Man cupped his hands and
dipped them
into the lake, drinking what he could scoop up.
"Better?" DemiDevimon inquired. "Y'know, we
should... uh-oh..."
"What?"
A piercing shriek filled the air, and the imp looked up to see a
serpentine
creature lift it's head clear of the water. A long blue body
stretched out
behind it, as it's bright yellow head stared down at him, eyes
filled with
malice.
"Uh, I don't think Seadramon likes you drinking from his
lake," DemiDevimon
offered unhelpfully.
"Ohhhh, poop," the Impossible Man groaned.
"Ice Blast!" the serpent screamed, firing a javelin of
solid ice directly at
the imp, who squealed, and was hit full force. His rubbery body
contorted as
the spike sunk into him, his skin giving way and stretching out,
as he was
thrown a good hundred feet backwards.
Content, the Seadramon snorted and sank back beneath the waves,
as
DemiDevimon fluttered over to where the Impossible Man lay.
"Dude," the imp looked up at him, "your world
sucks."
"Big talk from a guy who just said his own world blew,"
DemiDevimon replied,
settling down on the branch of a nearby tree.
The Impossible Man sat up with a grunt, and yanked the
Seadramon's Ice Blast
free of his chest. "Yeah, but, like, your dimension blows
hot AND cold.
Major suckage, bat-boy."
"Bull cookies!" DemiDevimon retorted. "My world
could cream your world any
day of the week!"
Groaning audibly, the Impossible Man got to his feet, and walked
over to the
temporal/spatial disruptor, which lay were he had set it down
when he
arrived, mercifully unscathed by any of the creatures.
"That..." the imp said, regaining his composure and
patting the disruptor,
"...sounds like a challenge."
- - -
TO BE CONTINUED!
- - -
NEXT:
Worlds collide as the Impossible Man and DemiDevimon begin a
contest to see
which of their worlds is top dog! However, it's unlikely that
either Marvel
heroes or Digimon will listen to anything the two
troublemakers have to say,
so some trickery is in order... and that just happens to be their
speciality!