this, you might want to read "The Cantaloupe Conspiracy," although the details of that fic are recapped at the beginning of this one. Then, there's always "The Saga of the FOX Kids Fantom"... ^_^

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(Part Two of "Fruit of the DOOM!")

By Chris McFeely

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The DigiDestined, and all their Champion level Digimon, with the exception of Stingmon, run down a corridor within the FOX Kids building. Charlene shifts in Izzy's hands, and turns to look at the camera.

Charlene: Hi - folks! You - sure - missed - a - lot - if - you - weren't - here - last - time! It - turns - out - that - the - cantaloupes - that - have - been - hanging - around - recently - had - actually - been - infected - by - a - small - portion - of - the - virus - that - created - Diaboromon - back - at - the - Christmas - Party! They - manipulated - Tentomon - into - eating - a - lot - of - their - number - - thereby - increasing - the - power - level - of - the - remaining - ones - - and - the - last - five - were - able - to - DNA - Digivolve - into - a - brand - new - Digimon - - - WaterMelomon! He - took - out - Stingmon - - and - we're - all - on - his - trail - right - now!

The kids and Digimon race onward, as, some distance up ahead, WaterMelomon bounces along like a frog on his two long hind legs. He screeches to a halt.

WaterMelomon: *sniff* I smell something... something tasty...

Just down the hall, inside the next recording studio...

Angela Anaconda: Ah, a baloney sandwich - my favouritest of sandwiches, on account of they are so tasty, which is why they are my favourite!

WaterMelomon smashes into the studio, and rips Angela's cardboard arm off as he chomps down on the sandwich and swallows it whole.

Angela Anaconda: Agh! I am in a lot of pain, on account of my arm has been eaten, which is why I'm in pain!

WaterMelomon looks oddly at the girl, then bites her head off.

WaterMelomon: Mmn... high in fibre...

The kids and Digimon burst in through the doors behind him.

Aquilamon: Hold it right there, vile fiend! Your nefarious schemes shall be put asunder, or verily, my name ist not Aquila-

WaterMelomon: SEED STRIKE!

Aquilamon: AUGHK!

Aquilamon is blasted back out of the studio.

WaterMelomon licks his lips.

WaterMelomon: You know... I'm really hungry... I wonder... what does a Digimon taste like...? *evil grin*

Izzy: We can't let him consume food! When it eats, the virus becomes more powerful - like when Diaboromon consumed computer data! If he eats enough, there's no telling what could happen!

ExVeemon: Well, actually, there IS telling, but if we did, it would ruin the surprise for the kids at home.

Izzy: That was a very poorly constructed sentence...

ExVeemon: You know who to blame... *points at fourth wall*

Ankylomon: Let's lay the smack down on his fruity ass!

"Let's Kick It Up" starts playing from out of nowhere, as the Digimon charge forward.

Garurumon: Howling Blaster!

WaterMelomon jumps upward, and the attack sears past underneath him.

Angemon: Hand of FATE!

WaterMelomon takes the full brunt of Angemon's attack, and is sent smashing down into the ground.

Ankylomon: Tail Hammer!

WaterMelomon receives a smack in the face from Ankylomon's attack, and it then picked up in Birdramon's claws, and flown up into the rafters, where he is dropped from.

Greymon: Nova Blast!

As WaterMelomon falls downward, Greymon's attack smashes into, but he seems none the worse for wear. He strikes the floor - and crashes right through!

Togemon: Crud! He got away!

Tai peers though the whole left in the floor.

Tai: What's down there?

Joe: It's... the Beast Machines recording studio!


Everyone jumps onto their Digimon as best they and they dive through the floor, into the Beast Machines studio. WaterMelomon has already eaten about a third of the now-techno-organic planet Cybertron.

WaterMelomon: It's an excellent source of roughage, AND it's rich in iron!

Izzy: We have to get him out of here! There's a huge number of weird, ugly ug ugmo blasphemous organic stupid ugly Transformers for him to eat down here! Did I mention they were UGLY and STUPID?

T.K.: I think we got that, yeah.

Izzy: 'Cause they are.

Ikkakumon: Harpoon Torpedo!

The pointy li'l attack imbeds itself in WaterMelomon's sweet, sweet flesh, and then explodes, blowing a chunk out of him.

WaterMelomon: OW! You're gonna pay for that!

WaterMelomon takes a bite out of a passing Maximal, and the hole begins to regenerate itself.

Kari: He's an Ultimate level! Our Digimon can't beat him if they're only at Champion stage, because it's a great plot device and way to get more Digimon into the series and to make money out of!

Sora: And despite the fact they gave up the power to go Ultimate to let Imperialdramon Mode Change, they're gonna do it anyway!

All: Yeah!

Togemon: Togemon, Digivolve to... Lillymon!

Birdramon: Birdramon, Digivolve to... Garudamon!

Ikkakumon: Ikkakumon, Digivolve to... Zudomon!

Tentomon twitches in Izzy's hands, still in his cantaloupe-induced coma. Wormmon does not have the
strength to Digivolve, to ExVeemon is left on his own, with the others DNA Digivolve.

Angemon and Ankylomon: Ankylomon! Angemon! DNA Digivolve to... Shakkoumon!

Gatomon and Aquilamon: Aquilamon! Gatomon! DNA Digivolve to... Silphymon!

Greymon turns to the camera.

Greymon: We hope this little plot oversight isn't going to spoil the fic for you, kids. Fact is, we're gonna KEEP going Ultimate in these fics, regardless of wether we can do it in the show. Ain't that right?

Garurumon: Yup!

A blast from Lillymon's Flower Cannon is deflected by WaterMelomon, and explodes beside Greymon and Garurumon, turning them back to Rookies.

Agumon: Ah, crud. Well, I'm sure you can guess what'll be happening in a while anyway...

Silphymon grapples with WaterMelomon, then picks him up and throws him through a wall.

WaterMelomon: Oh, the shame! Beaten by a girl!

Silphymon: I'm not a girl I? At least... I don't think I am... maybe I am...

While "it" is distracted, WaterMelomon kicks Silphymon in the head, knocking "it" back into Lillymon.

WaterMelomon bites another hunk out of Cybertron.

Shakkoumon: Justice Beam!

The attack narrowly misses WaterMelomon, and he snarls... but then, a small black monkey-lookin' robot runs up.

Optimus Primal: Stop this! Stop fighting! You're soldiers... friends!

WaterMelomon and Shakkoumon look at each other, and then at Optimus.

Shakkoumon: Kachina Bombs!

WaterMelomon: Seed Strike!


Optimus bits rain down.

Shakkoumon: Hippie.

WaterMelomon: Dink.

WaterMelomon bounces over Shakkoumon's head, barrelling through Garudamon and Zudomon, and charging out the door and down the hallway.

Ken: GodDAMMIT, he's getting away AGAIN!

Davis: What's down THAT way?

Matt: It's... the... oh, crap! The CAFETERIA!

- - -

Meanwhile, in the cafeteria...

BlackWarGreymon contemplates a lima bean.

BlackWarGreymon: Ah... to be like the bean... to have purpose... to grow... to live... to be picked... to be crushed to paste between the grinding molars of intelligent carbon-based life... to be swallowed and dissolved by searing gastric acid... THAT's the life for me...

BlackWarGreymon eats the bean.

At a table near to him, the three Censors sit and eat like madmen - which is normal for them.

On the other side of the room, Daemon and his homies are sitting around one table.

(Author's note - this is the Daemon Corps' first appearance in one of my fics, except for LadyDevimon... see if you can spot the subtle personality quirk they have been supplied with).

Daemon: Grr... these fishsticks are cold. You two, go pop a cap in the chef's motherlovin' ass.

MarineDevimon: Word up.

SkullSatamon: You better recognise.

(Told you it was subtle).

At another table, LadyDevimon, Devimon, Puppetmon, Myotismon, Piedmon, Arukenimon and Mummymon sit.

Devimon: ...and that's how I lost my legs.

Mummymon: Fascinating. Especially the part about the rabid Chihuahuas.

Myotismon: Losing your legs isn't much fun, but then, being turned into a weird cybernetic Gundam-esque thingy isn't all it's cracked up to be either, y'know.

Daemon: Get OVER here, bitch!

LadyDevimon: Don't call me that!

Daemon: Why not? You're MY BITCH! Now get over here, bitch!

LadyDevimon: I'm warning you, don't call me that.

Piedmon: Yes, I do believe the correct term would be "Byatch."

Myotismon: Are you sure? I've always preferred "Bee-a-itch."


The doors fly open, and WaterMelomon bounds into the room.

The Censors don't look up from their table, continuing to gorge themselves.

Arukenimon: What the...?

Mummymon: It's a giant watermelon, my sweet.

Arukenimon: I can see that, moron, but when was the last time you saw a watermelon with eyes, legs and arms?

Mummymon: Well, it's funny you should ask that, because I remember this one party that Machinedramon threw, and boy...

BlackWarGreymon: Ah, to be like the watermelon...

Mummymon: Will you shut up? I'm telling a story!

Devimon: Hey...

Mummymon: What?

Devimon points down, and Mummymon looks to see WaterMelomon chewing on his leg.

Mummymon: ACK! Get off of me!

WaterMelomon: Peuugh.... too dry...

Mummymon: Eat my tater tots, if you have to eat something, you weird-lookin' thing, you.

Mummymon tilts his plate, and the tater tots pour into WaterMelomon's mouth. He grins and nuzzles up against Mummymon's leg.

Mummymon: Hey, he's cute!

Arukenimon: Let me feed him now! Here boy, here!

Arukenimon dangles a pork chop in the air, and WaterMelomon jumps up and grabs it, eating it whole. Everyone at the table laughs.

Puppetmon: *to Piedmon* Can we get one?

Piedmon: No! They're too much of a responsibility, and you're not old enough.

Puppetmon: I am TOO old enough!

Piedmon: Just play with this one, and I'll think about it on the way home.

Puppetmon feeds WaterMelomon a meatball, and is about to feed him another, when the DigiDestined and their Digimon burst in.

Ken: Drop the meat, wood-boy!

Puppetmon: *sniffle* He's making fun of me...

Piedmon: I can't be fighting all your battles for you.

WaterMelomon hops up on to the table, and begins devouring all the food in sight.

Devimon: Now, that's just RUDE.

WaterMelomon snarls at Devimon.

WaterMelomon: SEED STRIKE!

A barrage of pellets strike Devimon, knocking him over.

Devimon: Argh! Help! I've fallen, and I can't get up!

WaterMelomon starts firing all around him, and everyone dives under the tables except the DD and their Digimon. LadyDevimon grabs Devimon.

Devimon: Thanks.

LadyDevimon: S'okay.

Devimon: S'awright.

Daemon: Get OVAH here, BITCH!

Censor Bob and Steve struggle to drag Joe under the table.


Davis: We've gotta stop WaterMelomon from eating! Guys, can you do it?

ExVeemon: Sure t'ing!

ExVeemon dives at the table... and begins scarfing down food as fast as he can before WaterMelomon can.

Davis: Eh, not what I had in mind, but...

Ken: Wormmon, you can help!

Wormmon shuffles over to another table with Silphymon and Garudamon, and they start eating the food there, while the other Digimon, and even the DD start clearing out the other tables. Censor Joe reaches up and grabs his tacos.

MarineDevimon and SkullSatamon come out from the kitchen.

MarineDevimon: We popped a cap, but good.

SkullSatamon: Yo, what's all this?

Daemon: Just start EATIN', foo's!

MarineDevimon and SkullSatamon run back into the kitchen.

Wormmon: A good meal always gets me feeling fit again... Wormmon, Digivolve to... Stingmon!

Stingmon: Consider THIS payback! SPIKING STRIKE!

Stingmon plunges his stinger into WaterMelomon's soft, sweet, juicy... mmmn... watermelon....

WaterMelomon: AAARRGH!

Agumon: And here it goes... Agumon, Warp-Digivolve to... WarGreymon!

WarGreymon lunges at WaterMelomon, knocking him off the table.

WarGreymon: Keep eating, everyone! I can weaken him...

WaterMelomon: Melon KICK!

WarGreymon is sent flying backwards.

Gabumon: Gabumon, Warp-Digivolve to... MetalGarurumon!

MetalGarurumon pauses, and looks into the camera.

MetalGarurumon: Now, I know that technically, I'm not supposed to be able to DO that, but the fact is, as he's so fond of saying, realism is not something the author is going for. I'm going to KEEP appearing, regardless of power, Azulongmon or whatever - not because the author LIKES me, because he doesn't, but so that we can get his favourite Mega. Now, just overlook my presence, and enjoy the fic.

WarGreymon: He's... getting even stronger! I don't think either one of us can take him!

MetalGarurumon: Then let's...

WarGreymon and MetalGarurumon: ...DNA Digivolve to... OMNIMON!

Omnimon strikes a pose.

Omnimon: I'm so damn cool, it's not true.

WaterMelomon unleashes another Seed Strike, but it harmlessly bounces off Omnimon's armour.

Omnimon: Supreme CANNON!

WaterMelomon is able to avoid the blast, but he realises he's outmatched.

Ken: We're winning! Let's tip the balance!

ExVeemon and Stingmon: ExVeemon! Stingmon! DNA Digivolve to... Paildramon!

Paildramon: Desperado Blaster!

Paildramon's attack scorches WaterMelomon from behind, as Omnimon charges forward with his Transcendant Sword shining.

WaterMelomon: This is NOT good...

WaterMelomon jumps high into the air, and backflips over Paildramon. Omnimon moves to slow to stop his swing, and one of Paildramon's blasters has it's tip hacked off.

Paildramon: Hey! Watch where you're pointing that thing!

Omnimon: Don't GO where I POINT it!

MarineDevimon and SkullSatamon drag themselves out from the kitchen, their stomachs bloated.

MarineDevimon: We... done... ate it... all!

Izzy: Prodigious!

SkullSatamon: Only... thing... left is... this bunch.. of grapes!

WaterMelomon's eyes light up, and he charges towards the two Ultimates.

Paildramon: I'm open!

SkullSatamon hurls the grapes to Paildramon, who catches them.

Paildramon: *ExVeemon* Excellent catch, if I do say so myself. *Stingmon* You? *I* caught them! *ExVeemon* YOU? It was ME! *Stingmon* ME! *both* WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS NOW!

WaterMelomon charges towards Paildramon, who looks left and right.

Omnimon: Over here! Over here!

Paildramon throws the grapes towards Omnimon... they sail through the air...

Omnimon: I got 'em... I got 'em... wait a minute... I DON'T HAVE ANY HANDS!



Shakkoumon: - GGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Ken makes a mad grab for the grapes, but he falls short, and they smack Omnimon in the head. WaterMelomon leaps up as they rebound, and snatches them in his jaws.

WaterMelomon lands, and turns back to look at his opponents. With a cackle, he tosses the grapes into the air, and catches them in his mouth. After a moment's chewing, he swallows.

WaterMelomon: I think THAT should do it!

WaterMelomon begins to glow brightly, and swirling translucent digital code whirls in the air around him.


WaterMelomon's arms and legs retract into his body, and his mouth shuts, His eyes close and disappear, and the remaining watermelon whirls on the spot, rising up into the air with the digital code. It glows, and morphs... and then, when it hits the ground, it is no longer a watermelon, but a very, VERY large... marrow.

Ken: First fruit, now vegetables?

Glowing yellow eyes appear on the front of the marrow... but then, a head, reminiscent of Infermon's, pokes it's way out of the marrow, on the end of a long neck, which stretches out into the air. Four long, cable-like legs sprout from the length of the marrow, each one ending in a foot with four sharp protrusions. The head twists and looks down at those around the cafeteria.

New Digimon: ...MARROWMON!

Charlene immediately bleeps and brings up Marrowmon on the Digimon Analyser.

(To see Marrowmon's Digimon Analyser, click HERE - yet more interactive-ness!)

Marrowmon (narrating his Analyser): I'm a mean, green, fighting machine! As the Mega form of WaterMelomon, I'm even more powerful, and I'm sure you'll find my Green Thunder attack simply shocking!

Charlene: Bad - pun... BAD - PUN!!

Marrowmon twirls around, to face the assembled Digimon, but they are weak and weighed down by all the food they've had to eat, except Omnimon, who's ready to RAWK because he's THAT DAMN COOL. The others emerge from under the tables.

Marrowmon: Now... I am at my full power! The time has come to fulfil my ULTIMATE plan!

Daemon: Sucka, you betta reCOGnise my ability to destroy your soul! EVIL INFERNO!

The flames splash against Marrowmon, leaving a small black scorch mark.

Marrowmon: That all you got, "ho"?

Daemon: Ain't no muthaluva alive who calls ME a ho! Pop a cap, boys!

SkullSatamon and MarineDevimon groan, and are unable to stand up under their own power, so full of food are they.

Daemon: Dayamn. Bitch, do something!

LadyDevimon: Not if you keep calling me that, I wont!

Myotismon: GRIZZLY WING!



The attacks all smash into Marrowmon's side, and his body topples over... however, his legs stay firmly planted on the ground, and he lifts his body up again.

Piedmon: Bugger!

Arukenimon and Mummymon morph into Digimon form.


Mummymon launches off a series of blasts from his rifle, but Marrowmon ducks and dodges them.

Omnimon: Supreme Cannon!

Marrowmon dodges, and the blast explodes on the ceiling, burying BlackWarGreymon under a ton of plaster and other roof-stuff.

BlackWarGreymon: *muffled* Ah, to be like the ceiling...

Marrowmon: My turn! GREEN THUNDER!

The three-pronged decal on Marrowmon's forehead glows green, and a crackling bolt of energy leaps out towards Mummymon. He squawks, and ducks, and it hits Arukenimon.

Arukenimon: ACK! Goddamn you, you bandaged son of a--!

Arukenimon is cut off, as she glows and shrinks down... down...

Mummymon: Oh my God...

Mummymon runs to the spot where Arukenimon was standing and kneels down to look at Arukenimon now.

Mummymon: ...she's been turned into a cantaloupe!!!

Mummymon picks up the small green fruit that was once Arukenimon.

Marrowmon: You'd better believe it! I will transmutate every living creature on this planet into my fruity brethren - beginning with you, those who defeated the virus in it's previous incarnations! I couldn't let that fool Fantom take this from me, so I helped defeat him when I was just a bunch of cantaloupes, but now, I'm ready to exact revenge for my predecessors! So - WHO'S NEXT?!

Paildramon: We've got to try for it!

Ken: Don't be ridiculous! You don't have enough strength!

Davis: We can't give up! C'mon Paildramon, let's show him who's boss!

Paildramon: Paildramon, Mega-Digivolve to... Imperialdramon!

Imperialdramon lunges at Marrowmon, who braces himself.

Imperialdramon: Time to weed the vegetable patch!

Devimon pops up in front of the camera.

Devimon: Will Imperialdramon have the strength to defeat Marrowmon? And will the new villain succeed in his plans? Find out, on the next Digimon: Digital Monsters!

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Tune in next time for:


- the conclusion to "Fruit of the DOOM!" when Ken will get a special surprise!

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